From Across the Pond
Welcome back, curious minds, kind souls, and passionate doers! Today we are continuing with the Past, Present, & Future series, where I look back on my past writing and share my headspace from then, my current frame of mind now, and my hope for the future. I will also share lessons or advice of which I have learned along the way.
Before getting into today’s post where of an immigration paper I once wrote, take a moment to find a comfortable spot and then, take a few minutes to revisit your own journey to this point. Think of all the hurdles you have overcame, the unexpected losses that reminded you just how strong and resilient you are, and the moments that truly make life beautiful. Then, when you are ready to begin today’s new journey forward, I will be waiting for you below.
“Hi there, great to see you. I hope all is well. Just a quick message before we begin this journey ahead together. Out of respect for privacy, I will not be sharing the name of the individual I spoke to or any specific details regarding them. Carry on.”
Now you may be someone who is also curious of this subject, maybe you have your own personal experience, or it was something you did not have to ever consider or really think about, but you stumbled upon this post. No matter the journey it took you to get here, to this point in your life, you are here now and that is what matters most. So, I invite you to walk this path with me. And as you do, I hope there is one thing you take away from reading this post: that it offers you a fresh perspective, and reminds you that at the core we are all one. Human.
Back in 2012, I was assigned to write an immigration paper for one of my classes. It was a subject I did not know too much about at the time but I was interested to learn more. Since then, I have listened to others share their often difficult and emotional journey. I have watched videos, listened to podcasts, and read stories on the matter. While I am far from an expert, here is what I have learned throughout my own journey.
There are many different types of immigration. From the one that is thrown around on the news all the time “illegal immigration,” where people come into our country without following the proper procedures and guidelines and are thus “undocumented” to “legal immigration,” which occurs by following those protocols before and as they enter into our country. Beyond that, there are several other breakdowns of immigration status as well as those who seek asylum compared to refugees, and so on. Here are some key points:
While waiting to get or receive a green card, it is recommended not to leave the US as it would be seen as abandoning the process/application. Of course, there are some special requirements that allow you to do so, such as an “Advanced Parole Document” or being about to prove that you still have work or financial ties to the US. However, there is also the chance of being taxed double the amount due to counting worldwide taxes. [Here] is more information on Green cards, the process, etc.
It can take several months to several years to receive a green card. From what I have heard, having a good lawyer helps you a lot in this process, but at what cost?
According to the 1951 Refugee Convention, it is not required that a refugee has to go to the nearest safe country to claim asylum. More so, it is a principle to seek protection in the nearest available country as it is a common understanding and practice.
According to the International Rescue Committee (IRC), “Refugees are those who have fled their home country due to war, persecution, or political upheaval. Some eventually return when it is safe to do so. Others stay in temporary refugee settlements or integrate into nearby countries offering asylum, while a tiny fraction resettles in a third country, such as the United States (“Refugees in America”, which you can read more about [here]).
Refugees do not choose their resettlement city. They may be placed in a city where they have relatives or friends, or where there’s an established community that shares their language or culture. Other considerations include: the cost of living and access to medical services as referenced from “Refugees in America”.
For undocumented immigrants, there are additional hurdles. Getting caught often means deportation. In addition to that, another point to consider is regarding children who are a part of Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA). While it is a temporary fix, it is not a lawful immigration status thus leaving them in “limbo” with limited opportunities. For more information, read [here] about the steps undocumented immigrants have to take for legal status (2025, "Legal Status for Undocumented Immigrants”).
While I believe that all of our systems here is the United States need to be updated and overhauled, immigration is certainly one. With immigration being such a hot topic these days, the conversation has already been started. Now we just need to figure out how to improve the system. If you are open to discussing this topic in further detail, I would love to hear your thoughts, your personal experiences, if there is anything I need to correct within this post, etc. I have a few social media links listed at the top, please feel free to send me a message.
But enough of my rambling, let’s get into the paper.
I started the conversation we had by asking a few general questions: “Where were you born?” “Where did you move here from?” “What was it like before you returned to the U.S.?” These questions gave me a starting point, but their answers gave me insight into completely different world. This is their story. They were born and raised here in the United States. From there, they immigrated to India before retuning back to America roughly 10 years later. At that point, they left the Central West part of India.
Transition whether relocation, immigration, or going from one thing to another, will always be daunting. It will be scary. It will be foreign. There will be trails, errors, and distractions. But the way in which we build from those challenges is what matters most.
As the interview continued, I learned more and more. Not just about them and their journey, but I learned a lot about myself and my own journey. While we may have connected over similarities, including being in the same class. It was then that my curiosity grew, my mind expanded, and I was inspired. Even though we lived two distinctly different lives up to that point, it did not stop us from connecting and relating to one another. It did not prevent us from being friends. It did not stop us in our tracks. Instead, our worlds became one at that moment in time.
Now while they had attended an international private school, had to wear a strict school uniform including: skirt, shirt, tie, and sometimes a blazer with their hair up, and it was mandatory to speak English, I attended public school in the U.S. where there is no designated language, and I just had to follow rules on what was vs. what was not appropriate for school. But there were also values we shared. Such as, how the living standards do not matter much to people, as they expect peace and life satisfaction. Rather than riches or financial prosperity. These were their words, not mine. But I like to think we all search for some kind of peace, and perhaps, financial prosperity in America is also one. In their experience up until the time the left India, financial prosperity was not one. It does not mean that their minds have not changed since. More so, it could be a sign of the times that we are all currently in.
From there, I learned more about their home life. For instance, they lived with their parents, a sibling, as well as extended family members, such as their grandparents. They had a total of six rooms in their house with three servants. Each one had a different goal. One was for gardening. Another washed the dishes. And the other one swept the floors and once in a while would wash the cars.
Continuing on from that point, I asked about the living conditions in India and what were like, they advised that “There was a variety. Rich, urban families enjoyed modern homes, servants, and cars. The middle classes usually lived in an apartment or smaller homes. And poor families lived in simple huts or roofed houses. Then, large joint families lived in big houses that had a lot of rooms.”
To reflect back and think how 13 years years earlier, we were sitting in the dining hall. It had an open floor plan and we were off to the side. At that time of day, there were not many students around. A few had walked by while we were talking but the area was much quieter than it usually was. Things just seemed easier back then. Just as they described their life being nice and carefree, my life in the United States also felt nice and carefree. I was at the school on scholarship. I was far enough away from home to explore that new chapter in my life but close enough to go home when I wanted. They did not have to do chores nor did they have a job as their parents were wealthy enough. This allowed us both to focus mainly on school and getting good grades.
We were also together when I tried the White Chocolate Mocha sample from Starbucks for the first time. And they are also the one who introduced me to curry. Which got me started on my journey of expanding my horizons and trying new foods.
As I type this, 13 years later, I have tried so many new foods even those I never thought I would try, such as flavored dead crickets, sushi both raw and cooked, oysters, octopus, kale, spinach, and the list goes on and on. I have chatted with countless others about their own experiences growing up. And yes, of course, as I am sure many of you want to know, I have even updated my coffee preferences as well (said in sarcasm). Now I prefer this Colombian coffee I can make a home. The White Chocolate Mocha, however, will forever remain a classic in my heart. But most of all, I enjoyed the heart-to-heart conversation we had that day. They were the first person who was willing to take part in my interview. They were transparent and vulnerable. Aside from the reason I started this website, I like to think they are the ones who gave me this idea and propelled me forward. They helped me on my own journey. And for that, I will always be eternally grateful.
Now before we go our separate ways for the week, here are a few other snippets from the interview and their experience in India:
A person stays with the family at all times.
Social life is important but it takes a good amount of time and money.
Kids inherit from their parents but oftentimes they still have to make money of their own.
Indian Weddings are huge and span a few days. Their cousin had over 2,000 attendees.
And here are a few of their own experiences living in the United States:
US life is very busy. People are so busy with their own life that they do not have time to visit family or grandparents.
Within American family relationships, family rarely sees each other.
As soon as the kids turn 18, they find their own way.
Most families lack relationships that are needed to keep the family together.
And last but not least, how living in India impacted them:
Living in India, it made me the person I am today. I am more emotionally attached to people, being around family is the biggest happiness I have received up until this point. It has made me more mature than ever. It has allowed me to make the correct decisions and become self-independent. And the greatest lesson of all is having a strong bond with your family which ties you down and grounds you.
Here is my stance on the matter. While I do believe in legal immigration as each country has their own policies and rules to follow in the process (even though I was taught in college that there is no such thing as illegal immigration as the argument is that people cannot be illegal but their actions can be), I think something needs to be done for those who have already entered the country under previous administrations. Because whether you and I agree with it or not, they were allowed to enter and those who did enter, had their reasons. Many of which, we may not understand or ever get the chance to hear. And while I think everyone who crosses our borders should be properly vetted, particularly for any kind of violent ties or hate towards America, we should focus on fixing the system (and other systems—criminal, health, etc) we already have in place. So, that these processes are more efficient and sustainable for the long term. Saying that, I do not agree with violent protests of any kind. I feel for those who are in constant fear for themselves and their loved ones, and what this all means to them. But we are a country of immigrants, people of God, and thus we should do what we can to support each other during these times.
Also, at the very beginning of my college journey, I was required to read a book, which I believe was Outcasts United (not quite sure but [here] is the link) and it inspired me to want to be a caseworker for refugees entering into the United States. More specifically, to help them settle into an area with finding a house, school for the children, etc. If you happen to hear of any openings, internships, or programs that would teach me some of those skills required for those kinds of jobs, it would be appreciated.
In addition to that, I have been a long time supporter of the IRC. I first learned about the organization and their efforts in one of my International Studies courses and I have followed them ever since. One could even say it is a dream job of mine other than sharing my life lessons on here and painting. But they are a fantastic organization as they have been providing support all over the world, so I am just going to share the link once more. You can read [here].
If you enjoyed this post, do not hesitate to share. And if you are interested in continuing the conversation further, please send me a message. Until next time (aka Monday, June 16th, 2025), have a fantastic week!
As a signature of my blog, I’d like to end this post with a suggestion to “Pass on kindness.” There’s no time like the present to Inspire Those Who Inspire You. Acts of kindness, no matter how big or small, can have a direct, positive impact on someone else. Go out there today and change someone’s life for the better!
***These are my personal opinions and may not be those of my employer.***
