The Quiet Art of Letting Go
Editor’s note: Originally written on June 27th, 2018. This post continues to evolve as I do. It’s updated to reflect growth, gratitude, and perspective gained since then.
Welcome, beautiful hearts and compassionate souls. Today we’re going to discuss a heavier topic. One we’ve all experienced at one time or another, an unhealthy or mismatched relationship. After all, not every relationship is meant to last forever. Some bring joy, growth, and belonging, while others leave us second-guessing ourselves, questioning our worth, or wondering why we feel so drained. The tricky part is that the difference isn’t always obvious in the beginning. What starts as comfort or connection can slowly turn into something heavier, something that doesn’t quite feel right. It’s in those moments of realization, sometimes subtle, sometimes sharp, that we’re faced with the choice of holding on or letting go.
I’ve been fortunate to only experience a couple of relationships that fell into this category. One being romantic and one friendship. What they had in common was this: at first, they didn’t seem unhealthy. But as time went on, I began to notice the signs.
Looking back, I realize the red flags were always there, I just overlooked them until patterns became too clear to ignore. I found myself silenced, my feelings dismissed, and my world shrinking smaller as time together began to take priority over family and friends. What once felt exciting quickly turned suffocating, leaving me without the space to breathe or be myself. It wasn’t love that held me there, it was hope that things would change. But when hope became the only thread left holding us together, I knew I had to let go. When I did, I thought that would be the end. It wasn’t. While our relationship may have been over, it didn’t seem to matter. What should have been closure instead left me feeling unsafe and deeply uncomfortable.
As for friendships, some started out genuine and supportive, but over time, the cracks showed. Words didn’t match actions. Effort faded, and the connection became inconsistent, appearing strong one day, disappearing the next. I began to realize that what I valued in the friendship was trust, honesty, and mutual care. Except it wasn’t being reciprocated. And when a bond leaves you questioning whether it was ever as true as you believed, that’s when it becomes clear it’s time to move on. .
Reflecting back, both of those chapters reminded me that relationships, whether romantic or platonic, reveal themselves in patterns. One argument or one letdown might be forgivable, but when the same cycle keeps repeating, that’s where the truth hides. It’s in the way someone responds to your boundaries. It’s in whether they make space for your family, your friends, and your individuality. And it’s in whether you leave interactions feeling lighter or weighed down.
The hardest part is that letting go doesn’t always come with the closure. Sometimes it’s messy, abrupt, or even cruel. And yet, it’s also freeing. Walking away gave me room to rebuild parts of myself that had been silenced, second-guessed, or minimized. I learned that distance doesn’t always equal loss, it can be the start of reclaiming your peace.
If you find yourself in a season of questioning your relationships, don’t rush to label them as “toxic” or not. Instead, pause and listen: do you feel safe, seen, and supported? Or do you feel drained, guilty, or small? Your answer may not come all at once, but your intuition often knows long before your mind is ready to accept it.
The truth is, you deserve people who respect your voice, encourage your growth, and celebrate the life you’re building. Letting go may be painful, but holding on to what diminishes you will cost you far more.
So, I’ll leave you with this, take a moment to reflect on the relationships in your life. Which ones lift you up, and which ones weigh you down? Sometimes the most courageous step isn’t holding on, but learning to let go.
Before you go on about your week, what relationships in your life remind you of your worth, and how do you nurture them?
As a signature of my blog, I’d like to end this post with a suggestion to “Pass on kindness.” There’s no time like the present to Inspire Those Who Inspire You. Acts of kindness, no matter how big or small, can have a direct, positive impact on someone else. Go out there today and change someone’s life for the better!
***These are my personal opinions and may not be those of my employer.***
